The Next Contestant
by Icarus 'Stryke' Aethon
Summary: Song-fic. Lightning bartends at Sazh's, the best bar & restaurant in Bodhum. Unfortunately, every idiot that walks through the door thinks it's a good idea to try and cop a feel. Every night it happens, and every night, Lightning and her boyfriend Icarus put idiots in the hospital. Rated M for language and violence.


I glared at Light with my arms crossed, and one word passed through my lips, "No." Why wasI glarng? Because she was wearing a very short skirt, and a white blouse that showed her stomach.

Dark azure eyes glared back, "Icarus, it's part of the dress code. Do you think I like working at Sazh's? We need the Gil, though."

"Who cares about Gil? Just once, can you take the night off?"

"You don't need to come with. I can handle myself."

"I know you can, Light. That's not the point here. The point is I don't want every drunk asshole there trying to pull something.

"After a few broken fingers and wrists, they start to get it." Light walked passed me and opened the door.

I sighed, "Another night of breaking noses." I followed her to the car parked outside.

* * *

><p>"Stryker, at your usual spot I see?" An Australian accent brought me out of my search for drunken douchebags.<p>

"Yeah, and don't call me that..." I turned to the woman who always seemed to go out of her way to make my job easier. She, like Light, was a bartender. Too bad Sazh only had them behind the bar. I sat at the very edge watching the door.

"You're not very talkative tonight...then again, after that fight last night, I don't think you would be. So, the usual?" I nodded. My usual was a shot of Jack Daniels and an empty beer bottle.

As she came back with my order, I heard her whisper, "Some guys you may want to take notice of. They're talking to Yuj, and one of 'em keeps gesturing his head toward Sunshine."

"They're on their way over now." I said, spying the group as I downed the shot. "It's the usual routine: talk to the DJ, Buy Light drinks, and then I go and say hi."

"I don't know who I feel more sorry for. Light, who has to deal with these punks, or the punks after getting a royal ass-kicking. After a while, you'd think people in this town would start to get it. I didn't say anything, just calmly picked up the bottle next to me.

* * *

><p>There were three of them. All of them wore black jackets, and had piercings. Their hair were in unethical punk styles: short and spiky. I brushed my hair out of my left eye to get a closer look. They were trying to buy Light drinks, which she subtly slid over to me. They were already smashed, based on the way they slouched on the bar. As Light turned to pour one of their drinks, the one in the middle, who I assumed was their leader, stretched over the bar. That was excuse enough for me. I flipped the bottle upside down in my right hand, and strode over to where they sat laughing amongst themselves.<p>

I tapped the shoulder of the punk who was closest to me, "Huh?" As he turned around, I smashed his face with the bottle, making him stumble backwards into the one who stretched over the bar. "Fuck!"

"What the hell? Why'd you crash into me, you dumbass!" He yelled at the one I hit, then grew confused, "Why the fuck are you bleeding?"

"I have the answer to that question." I spoke.

"And who the hell-" When he turned toward me, I introduced my boot to his face. The only one who was on his feet, looked at me, then at his friends in surprise before charging me. I shook my head, and stepped to the side, sticking my foot right before he made contact. "You fuck! I'll cut your dick off!" Their leader and the one with glass in his face were back on their feet, their fists raised.

I shook my head and picked up the barstool next to me. "Try it." I didn't even give them a chance to come at me before I threw the stool at them. As expected, they ducked.

"You missed you fu-" My fist cut him off. I landed another blow to the other side of his face.

"Didn't." I said as he let loose a wild haymaker, which I easily dodged. Glass Face was closing in this time. "Glass Face," I turned to him, "meet drunken douchebag." I jumped to the side as said douchebag tried to charge me. Both of them went down in a flurry of limbs. Something grabbed my neck from behind. Right, there was a third one. I threw my head back, and heard a satisfying crunch as it connected with his head. The moment he let go, I turned and threw him against the bar, hitting him twice. I turned him around, and smashed his face into the bar. "You boys ready for more?" I asked Glass Face and his leader. My eyes widened as I watched the leader pull out a pocket knife.

"I'm going to gut you like a pig."

That's when I heard someone call my name, and say something that sounded like catch. I turned and saw a pool cue fly towards me. I caught it, and turned to face the Patron Saint of Douchebags. Finally found a fitting nickname.

"Yeah, try it." I made the universal gesture for "Come on", before he charged me.

* * *

><p>I slumped once more on my bar stool in the corner, a second whiskey shot in my hand. It had been five minutes since Light saved my ass before tossing those punks out the back, and already another problem walked through the door.<p>

"Oi, Stryker, isn't that the broad who tried to kiss Sunshine?" Fang asked as she noded to the blonde who just entered. Jihl Nabaat...a splitting headache and the only resident in Bodhum to be banned from Sazh's. I downed the shot, and cracked my neck before standing For once, Etro seemed to be looking out for me. Sazh's red-headed bouncer, Gadot, was already herding Nabaat out the door. From the volume of curses coming from outside, I'd say Nabaat performed an act of testicular manslaughter.

I sighed, and turned to Fang, "How long have I been here?"

"About twenty minutes." She answered, already pouring another shot of whiskey.

"Figured."

* * *

><p>I stumbled, then collapsed back in my spot with a sigh and a bloody nose. Not five minutes ago, some asshole thought it would be funny to slap Light's ass as she passed him. Obviously, she broke his hand, but the son of a bitch had four friends. Light and I made sure they would be spending the remainder of the night in the hospital, but one of the little fuckers nailed me. These douches weren't drunk, just mentally retarded.<p>

"Man, did you see that punk's face when you literally threw him out? Priceless." Fang's laughter drowned out everything else. "You're slowing a little, Stryker. You sure you want another shot? I mean, after how drunk you got last night-"

"I'm fine, Fang." _For fuck's sake, does she have to keep mentioning last night?_

* * *

><p>I glared as I downed a seventh shot. It seemed every single prick at the bar was staring at her chest. I gently set the glass down and stumbled over to the prick closest to me. He was dressed in a black T-shirt and pants. He had spiky black hair that went to the nape of his neck and cobalt blue eyes.<p>

"Can I help you?" He asked and my eyes narrowed. My response: I punched him in the face, grabbed hold of his neck, kicked the stool out from under him, and introduced his face to the bar...three times. An explosive pain erupted from my groin, and I instantly let the dick go to cover mine. Something made contact with my face, and I felt my nose crack. Apparently, that 'something' was a boot. Two hands grabbed my shirt collar, and pulled me off the ground. As soon as I was facing the prick, I head-butted him. We both recoiled from the pain. "You dumbass, no one wins in a head-butt!" He yelled as he nursed his forehead with a gloved hand.

I leaned against the bar, doing the same, "And you're an asshole!"

He looked up at me, "You attacked me. How am I the asshole?"

I stumbled once more, my vision hazy, "You were staring at her chest!" I rushed him. He tensed and got in a stance.

Then I was staring up at the ceiling and a familiar voice spoke, "Icarus, I'll deal with you when my shift's over. You, pay for your drinks, and leave." From the sounds of a huff, and the door opening, he did as ordered. "C'mon, on your feet." In my blurry vision, I saw a hand, and grasped it. I was pulled onto my feet, and was leaning against someone. The familiar, pleasant scent of roses entered my nostrils, and I sighed. Light.

"Yeah, it's me." She whispered. I must've said it aloud.

"Oi, Sunshine, why don't you go home? I'll cover for you." That was Fang's voice.

"Fang-"

"Don't even think about finishing that sentence. You've earned it."

Light sighed, "Thanks."

"Don't mention it. Now get back home."

We shuffled back to the car, and I rested against the car door feeling exhausted.

* * *

><p>"Icarus, wake up. We're home." My eyes fluttered open, and I was met by the face of a goddess. I slowly raised my hand to her ethereal features. Her dark azure irises closed and she leaned into my palm.<p>

"Beautiful." I softly exhaled. Her eyes opened, and she smiled slightly. I felt myself being lifted, and felt the ground beneath my boots once more. What happened after that came in flashes. We moved through the doorway, we were at the top of the staircase, I was laying down on a comfortable bed curled around Light. I rose my head, brought my lips softly to hers before everything went black.

**A\N: Hey guys. I'm not dead, just going through a block. I am soo sorry, and I promise Chapter 17 will be up soon. Please accept this song-fic one-shot thingy as compensation for my long-ass absence and as a Happy New Year's gift. Please RR, follow and\or Favorite, and Flame**  
><strong>Happy New Year, <strong>  
><strong>Stryke<strong>


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